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Tuesday 31 January 2006

I don't know..

"Saying goodbye doesn't always mean that you are weak, sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go.."
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Good news : Laptop dah ok!!!
Bad news    : I used my own money to pay for the service..cost me RM1436...my own money!!! and now i only have RM200 in my ASB...sedey giler....ok la coz i learn to appreciate things more...tapi...all my savings, gaji2 dari 2-3 part time jobs habis mcm tu je...serius aku down giler babi....huhu...sampai aku dapat balik my RM1500, then only i'll be whole again...aarrgghh!!!

Neway, enuf with the laptop...so many things had happened since my laptop buat hal...which i better keep it to myself (n few people yg mmg tau)...

Since the event took place...i kept wondering to myself...are 'we' making the right decision???..is this the right path??..i just don't know what to do, or where to go next...i'm not sure whether this is suppose to be..or are we just hanging on and linger to something that is no longer there...???..

A friend told me, "close your eyes, free your mind and think...is this what you really want??"..
I did close my eyes, but it was hard to free my mind...i think a lot..n it seems like i cant stop thinking about everything...

Sometimes, people linger in relationships that are dead, out of fear of being alone or to postpone the inevitable grieving process that accompanies endings...But again sometimes, we need to linger for a while, to prepare ourselves, to get strong and ready enough to handle the change...and i don't want all these to be the reasons we are still together...i want the feeling to be real...not because we are afraid of what will or will not happen...

I know and understand that all the decisions made, and the path chosen will lead us somewhere...n whether we are in the right track or not, whether this path  will lead us to more happiness or sorrow, we just have to live with it, to make the best out of it, so we won't regret our decision. But if we're not meant to be, and we really have to go on our separate ways, i wish (hard) it wont be...now...and when the time comes,i wish i'll have enuf strength to let u go, n u'll have enuf strength to let me go...God bless us...





                                                        Sadness_1



Friday 13 January 2006

waa!!!...laptop rosak!!

Sedey giler....laptop rosak...kene panah petir...normally i wud shut up off my laptop mase hujan ribut petir...tp time tuh tak hujan lagi...kire first petir yg dtg tuh, trus attack my laptop...dowh...sedey gile..so now i'm in UM dekat lab com fak sains..



baru lps anta laptop gi service kat HP tower...mesti mahal gile..tp better anta sane kot dari anta kat kedai biase2...kan..kan..kan... (menenangkn diri sendiri)...



sedey sgt...biasenye kat rumah makan laptop, minum laptop, tido laptop...smlm bosan giler...buku sume dah habis bace...terpakse la mengulang2...dah le amik lebey kurang 3 working days diorg nak check dulu...then kalo aku ok dgn harge die baru proceed menyervice laptop tuh...gile lame...maybe dlm next 2 weeks baru dpt balik laptop...



i have to find a new hobby i guess...ataupun panjangkan waktu tido stiap hari...dari 10 jam have to extend sampai 15 jam ke...ok kan??...huhu...



lupe plak...dpt keje sementare as a examination attendant starting next wednesday..tp ade briefing esok...so..boleh le idup tanpe laptop jap kot...huhu...still sedey...



anyway...have a nice day guyss...huhu...



Sunday 8 January 2006

Aku dah tua???

NEW YEAR as usual xde bwk maksud ape2 dlm idup aku - just a reminder of how fast im getting older n add a year 2 my age...gile cepat....rase mcm baru je smlm aku masuk darjah 1 dekat SRK Convent Ipoh n now, i've finished my degree kt UM terchenta...huhu...



AArrggghh...i'm getting OLDER...tambah lagi wrinkles dkt muke...tambah masalah...tambah lemak...tambah la sume bende...kecik ati aku...wish i cud go back 2 my childhood days...although x le sumenye  best sgt...tp better la compare dgn zaman skrg....



Tp, yg dah lepas tuh tetap dh lepas...We dont have to forget the past or try to cover it up...it simply means, we move on and cherish all the memories....dan utk move on, we have to make sure that 2day is better than ysterday n 2morrow will b better than 2day...(di mana ini lah yg susah utk aku praktikkan...huhu...)



Ape pun, aku doa agar diberi kekuatan utk menjalani hari esok dan hari2 mendatang dgn jayanya...aamiinnnn....

Saturday 7 January 2006

panjangnye tajuk...

"We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world"...
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I just finished reading this book i bought a week ago..titled "If i had a wicked stepmother, where's my prince?"
Panjangkan tajuk....huhu..
This book is about a girl named Lucy-a sophomore, who moved from San Francisco all the way to New York after her father remarried a woman named Mara with 2 daughters. The only difference she had with the real cinderella is her father is still alive - only that he spends monday to friday in S.F finishing his case (he's a lawyer). So, technically she's the cinderella of this century...huhu..

    You guys may think this book is typical cinderella with a horrible stepmom n 2 gedik stepsis and ending with they-lived-happily-ever-after. Actually it is..heheh..But the gist of this story is slightly different. I cant explain it in words...so i recommend u guys...no..i mean girls (i dont think guys would be interested in this kind of book) to buy this book -it only costs RM60 - hardcover...huhu..( i know.. quite expensive 4 a book - but if u spend most of ur times reading n u are so into books like i do, it so worth it..)

    Written by Melissa Kantor - author of
"Confessions of a Not It Girl"  which i havent had the chance to read yet but definitely going to buy. It's a chic-lit kinda story n i do really like her narration...there's a touch of funny, sad, witty, touching, etc and yes..it makes me cry...huhu.. ( i'm just sensitive.. ok..)

    Anyway..here's the cover of the book n hope u'll like it..muaahhzzz..

Melissa_kantor




Like it..huhu

Friday 6 January 2006

marah....

aku sgt marah sekarang.... marah dekat 2 org yg x sepatutnye aku marah... yg x sepatutnye sape2 marah... tp aku marah sgt... tambah2 lg ingatan kat zaman dolu2 x hilang lagi... lagi la wat aku marah...
     Ade org kate " The things we remember the best are those better forgotten". Masalahnye aku x leh lupe bende yg zaman dolu2 tu... bende yg buatkan aku hidup x tenang sampai bile2... bende yg membuatkan aku jd seorg yg pemarah... aku nk cakap dekat org tu yg aku marah x leh... sbb aku takut... takut sgt... sbb die ajar aku jd takut...
    Aku x dendam... mmg x dendam... tp aku marah... sbb diorg buat aku jd mcm ni... tp aku jd mcm ni, diorg marah... (pening ke ayat aku ni???...aku pun pening...huhu)...
    Aku pk balik, ape yg aku buat yg membuatkan diorg marah, semue ade kene mengene dengan ape yg diorg penah buat n citer kat aku... So, ape salah aku??...
    Aku x sabar nak mulakan hidup aku dengan betul...ALONE!!...Liverpool punye motto yang menyatakan "You'll never walk alonetuh poyo ah...We'll always be alone... we cant rely on others for our happiness... sume tuh bergantung kat diri sndiri... ape yg kite perlu buat utk tak rase empty is dont stop loving...tu je buat kite kuat...tp ape pun...kite sume mmg 'alone' dlm erti kate sbnr... mati  nnt pun sorg2...huhu
    kusuik kopalo den pk hal idup. Basimpang siur raso urat kopalo. Indak tau nak buek apo... cheh!kuar bhaso minang + ngr smbilan...huhu..srius pening...rase mls nk idup pun ade...malas je...bkn rase nk mati... hehe...

    "O God the Almighty,
    I pray for courage as i begin this day
    For i understand there is work to be done
    burdens to be carried,
    feeling to be shared and joys to be celebrated;
    And when this day is done O Lord,
    may i have the courage to see Thy guiding hand
    in the friendships that have been made,
    in the hurts that have been healed,
    and in the strength that has been given"
    Amin Ya Rabbal 'Alamin...